Questions, Confusion or Spiritual Battles

April 7

Leaving Marilyn on Thursday night was difficult again because she got so upset every time I went out of the room. She would say don’t leave me or just a minute listen to me. Her mind was drifting in and out of reality. Having Ardith, Stephen and especially Tracey gave me the strength I needed after one of the hardest days I have ever spent. I was able to go home and get a nights sleep even though Marilyn called at 4 in the morning to ask me to bring her walker immediately.

I woke up at 8:30 after about 7 hours of reasonable sleep made and received a couple of phone calls, got up showered and ready in time for the QSP lady to come over and pick up all the magazine orders. After she left I sent out an eBay invoice for 2 Rockwell prints, went to the bank to pay MC and deposit a few checks I had been carrying around then headed up to the hospital.

I was afraid I would be making Marilyn wait after her MRI as time was flying by so I skipped breakfast and lunch and went straight up to the room. Surprisingly as I reached the nursing station I almost ran into Marilyn being wheeled back into her room. When she saw mw she began to call for me to help her and I could see she was very upset and disoriented. I followed the bed into the room and watched as the orderlies tried unsuccessfully to position her on the bed as she cried out in great pain. Seconds later an all call went out and several nurses rushed into the room to assist. Unfortunately Marilyn could not explain how to get her into a comfortable position. When they left I could see that she wasn’t turned properly on her side and I know that she would be feeling horrible. I called the nurses and explained what she needed. It took three nurses to sort of ½ move her on her side but Marilyn was beside herself in pain and confusion.

After the nurses left and I was alone with Marilyn I could see that there was definitely a spiritual battle going on and Marilyn had this evil look that I have never seen before. She reached out and grabbed my hair pulling for all she was worth saying that Satan was doing this to her. Then she demanded that no one but Christians could be in the room with her. The nurses recognized the spiritual need and sent out an emergency call for a chaplain who showed up outside the room within seconds. His name was Rob and he introduced himself to me. Not knowing his background I was unsure of whether or not he should go in with Marilyn. I didn’t know what I should do and then as if on cue Terry Young came walking down the hall. After introducing him to Rob and the nurses we agreed that he should go in to pray with Marilyn which he did (I took this as direct intervention from God) Marilyn still was not settling down and insisted she was in Spokane and that I was lying to her. She seemed to have lost all trust in the nurses and doctors. Terry and I went out to the lounge and talked while the nurses continued to work with Marilyn. Within a few minutes they came to the lounge asking for our assistance to calm Marilyn because she had ripped off her hospital ID and pulled out all her tubes. This time I was forced to scold Marilyn as if she were a little spoiled child but it seemed to work somewhat. At that point she kept giving me the evil eye and saying that I didn’t love her and was lying to her. Then she asked Terry to come close and tried to make a deal with him. She said I promise not to escape if you will fix my leg. Terry assured her that all he could do was pray for her. Marilyn then said “but you have the power” The nurses then asked that Terry pray for her and stayed with us as Terry prayed another beautiful prayer. Finally Marilyn settled down enough for the nurses to re set her tubes and give her a new ID bracelet. So I left again and called John Teibe asking for prayer against the evil one.

On top of all the commotion Dr Hunter and a students also came by to talk to Marilyn. He is a palliative care specialist who was so kind. He leaned over Marilyn’s bed and tried to assure her that everything possible that could be done was being done. I was able to also introduce him to Terry and he stayed for a prayer. He said he worked closely with the whole family and considered them all as patients and was very aware of the importance of spiritual needs.

Throughout the rest of the afternoon Marilyn went in and out of reality remaining very skeptical of me and maintaining that I was lying to her and that I didn’t love her. She asked me if I could see our house out the window and then said – that proves we aren’t in Calgary – we are in Spokane. Then she insisted that I go bring the van to the back door so we could sneak out and go home. That was very upsetting to me but I realized that she was still under the influence of strong meds. She started asking for Faith so I called First Alliance but never connected with her. Instead I was able to get Ruth Bittle on the phone and she talked and prayed with Marilyn for a bit. I also got hold of David who talked to her for a while trying to assure Mom of where she was etc.

Somewhere during all this Dr Lee cam by (Dr. Shacker the bone specialist, resident assistant) asking whether or not they should order general anesthesia for her biopsy on Monday. I decided that due to the risks we should not but just take a local freezing. Now I am praying that Marilyn will be in the right frame of mind for this as this is the final test that allows the Doctors to know exactly what is going on and what treatment regime they need to follow. I took him out into the hall for the conversation because Marilyn was saying that he should not be there with her because he was not a Christian. Out in the hall I explained that even though we were strong Christians ourselves that we would not make judgments against others because of their particular beliefs and that Marilyn wasn’t at all in her right mind so not to worry. His comment was – I don’t even think about those things, as they are not appropriate. So the biopsy will be sometime on Monday and then the doctors will come and explain what the exact treatment will be.

This had fully exhausted me so I decided to go for a bite to eat as it was 5 PM and I had not yet eaten anything. When I asked Marilyn if she would mind me going down for something to eat she flatly said no you can’t go. I did anyway. As I was walking past the chapel something compelled me to stop in and I began flipping through the prayer journal. It felt right to add a prayer so I wrote a prayer for Marilyn and left it there hoping someone would pray over it. From there I went to the window and just looked out over the river and cried inside. The cell phone rang and it was Doug Schroeder. I couldn’t believe God’s timing. We talked and prayed together and then I went and got some soup and hot chocolate.

I was hoping that someone would soon come up to visit and relieve me so I called David just as he pulled into the parking lot. We had a good visit in the lounge while waiting for Tracy. I went down to check on Tracy and a new nurse was in the room prepping Marilyn for a move into a private room. The explanation was that they wanted to relieve her anxiety but I found out later that her roommate asked to have her taken out. I guess there is more ways than one to get your own private room. Anyway I thanked God for this as another intervention. (Afterwards we wondered if perhaps an evil spirit was living in her first room.) When we told Marilyn we were moving her to a private room she thought we were going home again.

David and Tracy helped gather all of Marilyn’s things together and move them down the hall. The new room is nice and quiet with a whole different feeling. With a little help Marilyn was able to get somewhat comfy and I began to massage her thigh. David and Tracy came in and we prayed together with Marilyn. The kids wanted me to go out with them for supper but I declined and stayed until 9 just softly massaging Marilyn. I decided to sing to her to try to soothe. I don’t know if it helped but I thought maybe I could attract some angels to stand guard for the night. This time when I asked to leave I found no resistance so it was much easier to head for home.

In the car on the way home I picked up the cell phone and listened to John Teibe as he told of gathering some prayer warriors together and what he thought we should be praying for. Later when I got home I discovered that at the exact moment I was listening to him on my cell he had arrived in the room and was praying the prayer with Marilyn. Another intervention.

When I got home I Talked to Ardith John Teibe and Dolores, had a slice of bread, some hot tea and chocolate then headed off to bead. I slept till 3 then woke up and decided to write this as a record of the days events. I don’t think I could ever remember everything if I left it. In the middle of writing this I saw Jack Newton on line so talked for a bit and updated him on Marilyn. Its 4:22 so I guess I should go and sleep again as I am tired now.

Over and out

It is 11:30 AM on Saturday and I have had another fairly reasonable sleep. I just woke up to a phone call that hung up, sent out an email to Lyn, Shirley and John Teibe with this journal so that they know what is going on from my perspective. Now I will get myself ready for the next instalment. I'm not sure what to expect so I will lean on the Lord and expect nothing. Maybe I will have time to work on my computer or read so I will take things with me just in case.