Good Signs

In the past 24 hours my phone has rung more often than normal. Most of my calls are from telemarketers wanting me to subscribe, answer questions and generally waste my time. However these calls have been different – They have been from my wife – asking me to remember this or that – asking for things to be brought up to the hospital. I know that when she can rag on me for anything that she must be feeling better – a very good sign. I think we all have times when we wish our partner would just leave us to our own devises and get off our backs. In this case however, I don’t have that feeling at all. I know this is a good sign. It is amazing how much I missed the sound of her voice. I even dreamed one night that Marilyn was upset at me for something and was letting me know about it only to wake up and discover that she was no longer there beside me. So the sound of her voice – no matter what she wanted - had a welcome ring in my ears.

I finally had a feeling that my visit was constructive for the first time in the entire 2 weeks that Marilyn has been shut inside the hospital doors. Yes, there still were the ups and downs. The concerns were still just as prominent, but this time I felt as if something was being accomplished. Marilyn and I took a long “walk” (that is me walking and her riding) outside in the sunshine stooping by the cafeteria for a treat and then back up to the ward to watch the news together. She was also able to manage a few steps on her own with me even though earlier in the day had an episode where her knee gave way and caused a bit of a ruckus for the staff. I was happy that she agreed to give it another try after a rest. Because of the confusi0n caused by medication, Marilyn needs lots of assistance even remembering how to take the first step, turn around and sit etc. but what an improvement over the last 2 days.

We still have many concerns but also many answered prayers. A big question that still looms on the horizon is the question of her treatment. After 2 weeks she has not yet received her first treatment. She has had a radiation simulation and her case in the planning stage. Yesterday my phone rang again and it was the radiation oncology department asking to speak to Marilyn. I was quite surprised that they thought they would find her at home when only one day prior, Dr Lim, the radiation oncologist. had been in to see Marilyn to discuss the plan. Dr Lim works just an elevator ride away from her room. After some detective work I discovered that apparently the clerk from Marilyn’s first hospital ward room had informed his secretary that Marilyn was no longer in the hospital and now back home. The call was to inform us that the next appointment for Marilyn would take place September 9. This news did little to impress me so I placed a call to her oncologist Dr. Dowden. I am so thankful for him because he is a great advocate for Marilyn. Within 5 minutes he called back to report that he had hopefully pushed the right buttons to get the show back on the road.

Today is another day – and as I was so aptly reminded by my good friend and fellow cancer survivor- Dale Biebrick, - “We can’t worry about tomorrow – that is God’s department, we can only live each day one at a time and do the best we can in that moment".   Now I have to get busy and gather up all the things I have been reminded by Marilyn not to forget.

God Bless You - Bryon